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Ritters Hair
December 9 - May 11

My mother forced me to end my streak of no haircuts and Ritter was forced to cut his hair as well, but not by this mother
but by alcohol
After consuming half a bottle of rum at RitterFest34, Ritter got the idea to shave his head
"i got so drunk I ended up shaving my head," says the local legend
The length and grease level of ritters hair was reaching historic proportions but it all came to an end last night. The now bald blimp had this to say, "I was like midway through it and I just thought what the fuck am I doing, but I just went with it."
His hair may have stopped growing, but his legend never will

-n